Bruises Seen and Unseen
by Serenity River
Summary: How does Cassie deal with the trauma from Jolinar? What about Sam? WIP NOT COMPLETE APP WON'T LET ME CHANGE THIS!
1. Bruises

First off... I don't own anything. I have never owned anything and if i did own anything SG1 would never have ended...

Synopsis: How did Cassie deal with the trauma of Jolinar? Set after In The Line Of Duty.

Totally unbetaed so if I make a mistake... oops. Also written on a phone so fat fingers happen. I am trying to catch them.

Also I wrote this on the fly because I had nothing better to be doing so it's not great but it's something.

Janet and the rest of SG-1 smiled from the doorway as they saw their young captain react to something for the first time in 2 days. That something was the sweet little alien girl she held so deep in her heart.

"Maybe we should give them some alone... to heal," Janet said knowing how scared her adopted daughter was knowing, feeling, her Aunt Sam was blended. "I'll be in my office."

The men of SG-1 spared one more glance at the two on the hospital bed. Cassie had since wrapped herself against Sam's side and was excitedly telling her about all her new classes. They left feeling that seeing Cassie was exactly what Sam needed.

An hour later Janet peeked from her office and found the two fast asleep. Sam was still easily worn out from her ordeal and it was pushing Cassie's bedtime. Since the next day was Saturday and Cass would not have school, she figured there would be no harm in just letting the ladies sleep.

Taking one last look and smiling, Janet closed her office door for but a crack and laid down on the cot she had set up for herself.

Little did she know unseen wounds would surface.

Cassie could still sense the symbiote within Sam. It scared her. She had to keep reminding herself that it was dead. At least that's what Janet and Uncle Jack said. It was dead and Sam lived. It still didn't stop her from feeling on edge no matter how hard she tried not to be. Still she dozed off with her head on hsr Aunt's shoulder.

The dream started out fine at first. She and Sam were painting. Cassie was painting her and Sam by the swings and Sam was doodling stick figures of SG1 and Cassie. Sam cracked a joke about the Colonel's head being too big. Just as Cassie giggled Sam turned towards her- her eyes glowed.

 _"Sam?? Sam...?"_ _"I have to leave this place. Show me to your Stargate!" Sam said in the metallic voice of a Goa'uld._ Sam reached out and grabbed cassie forcefully by both arms and dragged her to the door.

 _"Sam! Please stop! Sam... No... You're hurting me! SAM!"_ Sam was jolted awake by the feeling of Cassie start to writhe in her sleep. She heard the little girl mumble her name.

She started to thrash and yell louder. Sam's heart broke as she realized Cassie was stuck in a nightmare. About her. About the Goa'uld within her.

Sam put her hand on Cassie's wrists to stop her movements as she tried to coax her awake.

"Cass? Cass it's okay..." she said through a hoarse voice.

Janet, having heard her daughter's cries, came up to the bed and shook her daughter's shoulders. "Cassie baby. Wake up. It's just a dream."

"SAM!!!!" Cassie yelled as she jolted awake. The first thing she felt was the naquada presence within Sam and the older woman's hands on her wrists. Still trapped between sleep and wakefulness she screamed and yanked her arms out of Sam's hands. "No! Get away from me!!"

Sam's heart broke further when she heard this. It tore to shreds as she caught a glimpse of the still purple bruises the Goa'uld had left on the child- right where her hands had just been.

"I'm so sorry!" Sam was overcome with guilt. "Janet... Cass... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."

Janet took Cassie to her office and got her settled before returning to Sam's side. Sam was still muttering apologies. She was once again on her side, staring at the wall in front of her.

"What the hell happened?" The Colonel asked as he came up to the bedside, having heard Cassie's final shout from the hallway. "I thought you said she was doing better and was sleeping. Where's Cassie?"

"My office," Janet answered with a sigh. "And she was. Cassie had a nightmare about Jolinar. Sam saw the bruises. Physical and mental."

The tough Colonels heart was put in a vice when he heard his Captain choke back a sob.

"Go. Be with Cassie. I'll stay with Carter."

"I'm sorry Sir. I thought this would help them both."

"Me too Doc. It looks like the bruises are still just too fresh."

"Yeah..." Janet walked back to her office and held her little girl as she cried.

Jack sat beside his 2IC and grasped her hand to let her know she wasn't alone.

They would both heal and come together again but for now they had to let their bruises fade into the past a bit.

A/N: So that's it. That's what happens when I'm bored and write on the fly.


	2. Long Road Ahead

Cassie clung to her adoptive mother and sobbed. The tears seemed to never end. A new fear had formed.

"Sa..Sa...Sam..." she sobbed out. "Sh..She thinks I don...don't lo..love her anymore."

Janet was taken about by her comment. "No! No baby. Sam knows you love her. She loves you too."

"But I yelled at her. I told her to stay away. I was afraid of her," Her tears now turned to sniffles. "I hurt her."

"Cassie look at me. Sam loves you. She saw what the Goa'uld did to you. She had to see and feel her body hurt you and make you scared. She's out there right now feeling guilty baby. She saw the marks on your wrists Cass. She would never have hurt you on purpose. I'm sure she understands your fear sweetie. I think she may be afraid of herself right now."

"Why would she be afraid of herself Mom? She did not mean to hurt me. The goa'uld did it. It was just her body."

"My smart girl. That is exactly why she would be afraid of herself. She saw what her body could do to you, to people on this base... she had to watch herself do it with no control."

"Oh..." The little girl sighed.

"Why don't I take you home so you can relax and think about ways to cheer up Sam and yourself?"

"Can I paint her a picture? But wait! Don't you have to stay here with her?"

"I do. Colonel O'Neill is sitting with her now. I will come right back after we find someone to stay with you."

"Okay Mom. But first I want to say goodbye to Sam."

Meanwhile Jack had been out with Sam. Still holding her hand, he watched as his Captain cried quietly.

After a few minutes he decided to say something.

"Cassie loves you you know. The bruises aren't your fault. She knows that the snake is the one who did that to her."

She looked up at her commanding officer with red greif stricken eyes.

"But it was still me. It was my body. I should have fought harder to stop it."

"No! Sam you couldn't have fought any harder than you did! I know you were trying. Sam, even I would have lost that battle. No one blames you for anything."

She was stunned by the double use of her name and the compassion in his normally hardened eyes.

"I... it... made me do horrible things. I... it... made me hurt Cassie. It made me pull a grenade in the gate room. They may not blame me for what the goa'uld made me do but..." she trailed off.

"But what? But those who saw or expirienced will see you differently?"

She nodded. Fresh tesrs tracking down her face. She was embarrassed by thing display of weakness and quickly brushed them away with her free hand.

"No Carter. They know it was out of your control. Do you know what I see?" He watches her face turn bright red. He knows she's embarassed for showing this emotion. "I see a strong soldier who has NEVER let her team down. Who has fought every battle within ever inch of her being. Some she has won and some she has lost. She has come back from those losses though. I see her as stronger because she's still alive. You won life Carter."

He smiles as he sees her eyes widen at his wisdom. She often forgets that under that tough, "explain it all to me" act is a soft, caring, wise man.

He sobered up and continued, "When I saw you on the floor of that cell, I thought for sure you were gone. You weren't moving Sam. There was no sound. The guards were dead and thought for sure that I...we... lost you too. I was scared Carter. I couldn't lose another person to a snake. When you opened your eyes that brief moment I saw you. I didn't see the snake. I saw you fighting within every inch of your life to keep breathing. To win. You Sam... you won and as your commanding officer and as your friend, I'm so proud of you and so relieved to have you with us."

Sam allowed a half smile through the haze of depression. It was then that she heard Janet's office door open and the sound of tennis shoe covered feet running towards her.

"Sam!" Cassie enveloped her in a hug. "I'm sorry for being afraid. It wasn't you. I could never be afraid of you. I love you Sam!"

Jack took a step back to stand with Janet to give the pair some space.

Sam returned the girl's hug.

"I love you too Cass. I'm so sorry that it did those things. I promise that things will get better."

"I know Sam. We will do it together."

Sam couldn't help but smile.

"Yes we will. Headed home?"

"Yes we are. I figured I can't keep an active 10 year old cooped up in here forever. I will be back Sam. In the meantime, I want you to rest. Get some sleep." Janet ordered. "Don't make me get out the big needles!"

"D'oh! Those aren't good!" Jack piped up as he went along with the joke.

"Colonel, make sure our lady rests easy. Don't let her be alone in case of flashbacks or nightmares," She told him quietly.

He understood. He knew all too well what waking up alone was like after trauma.

"Come on Cass. Let's get going." Janet said ushering her daughter out.

"You're very brave. I love you," Cass told Sam one last time before following her mother.

She turned back on her side and sighed. The sigh was quickly followed by a yawn. She knew she had a long road ahead of her.

A/N: Might add more. Depends...hoping the muse doesn't get all blocked up.


End file.
